“I became completely blind... Anna earned money...”
Tobit
Opening Prayer Led by Group Facilitator
Proverbs 31
Pray the Proverb together aloud, alternating verses between two sides. When finished, share reflections on the Proverb as a group
10 Who can find a good wife? She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant, she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and tasks for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She clothes her loins with strength and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor, and reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes herself coverings; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.
Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning, is now and will be forever. Amen.
The Wife of a Patriarch
Misfortunes in Matrimonial Life
Tobit 2:9 - 3:6
1. Tobit’s misfortunes of exile and confiscation of goods are compounded by his accidental blindness, and his wife becoming the ‘breadwinner.’ How does Tobit respond to her bonus? How does Tobit’s embarrassment, sorrow and distress affect his relationship with his wife? How do embarrassment, sorrow and distress affect his relationship with God in his prayer? How has my embarrassment, sorrow and distress affected my relationship with my wife? How do I pray when I am embarrassed or sorrowful?
Fears, Tears & Protests
Tobit 5:16-22
2. Tobit commissions his son for an adventurous journey, but Anna expresses fears, tears, and protests. How does Tobit respond to his wife? Over what issues has my wife expressed fears, tears, and protests? How have I responded? How has my wife expressed fear, tears or protests in relation to the training of our children? How have I responded? How do I discern when to yield and when to resist my wife’s fears, tears and protests?
Dissonance & Disagreement
Tobit 10:1-7
3. How does Tobit feel about his son’s delay? How does Anna feel about her son’s delay? What does Tobit actually express to Anna? What does Anna express about Tobit’s assurances? With my wife, how do I discern when to share my fears, and when to shield her from my fears? When have I been an assuring voice for my wife in the midst of my own uncertainty? How do I proceed when my wife expresses disagreement or suspicion of me?
Resolutions
Choose a resolution for this week from the suggestions below or make your own. Tap on a resolution to email it to yourself:
1. I will praise my wife’s successes at home this week.
2. I will praise my wife in front of others this week.
3. I will praise my wife’s virtues to my children.
4. I will read Proverbs 31 with my wife, and point out her amazing qualities.
5. I will converse with God about a recent incident where I felt sorrow or embarrassment.
6. I will thank my wife for ways she surpasses me.
7. I will propose and plan an adventure that will stretch our family.
8. I will discuss with my wife the fears of our children, and what exercises will help our children face and surpass their fears.
9. I will speak with my wife about working through any fears of hers.
10. I will ask my wife how I can best support her when she’s sad, stressed, or crying.
Prayer Partners
Discuss with your prayer partner the success/failure of your previous resolution & offer a vocal prayer for one another.
Banner Image: "Anna and the blind Tobit" by Rembrandt [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons
Scripture quotations are from the Revised Standard Version of the Bible—Second Catholic Edition (Ignatius Edition) copyright © 2006 National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.